Real Meaning of Christmas

Well I know that I wont get things together in time to send out Christmas cards but I wanted to wish everyone a Very Merry Christmas!!!

Sing a hymn?

After I came home from work I was in a grumpy mood.  It was one of those days that just seem darn right bad! I started to sit down and review my day and think of all the bad.  How I woke up feeling like I got hit by a truck, how every call at work was someone complaining, How I got in a fight with my sister, and a million other little things that started to surface that I would love to complain about.  But then a little thought pop in my head, “what is all the complaining for? Its not going to make things better”  Then a little song popped in my head, “Count Your Many Blessings”  So instead of listing all the bad I will list all the good,…

I have a amazing family who have always been there for me
I have a good job that has been very understanding in everything
I have a amazing boyfriend who takes care of me and makes me oh so happy
I have friends that can make me laugh so hard I turn blue,
I have a great roommate and wonderful place to live.
I belong to the church of Jesus Christ
I not only have a great sister but she is my best friend.
I still learn from and draw from the experiences  I had on my mission everyday.
I  know that there are many people in my life who would do anything for me because they that amazing!
I live so close to so many temples and have the opportunity to go as often as I want!
I grew up close to my grandparents who taught me a lot!
I have parents who teach me by their example how to be Christ like and charitable
I had a mother and grandma and aunt who taught me to cook, clean, sew and be a successful women.

Those are just a few of the most important things in my life! There are to many to count so with all those great things in my life how can I be grumpy?

ummm I am working!

So yes I am at work and blogging! Do not sit there and judge me!  Its one of those days that I dont care, I will do anything to make the day go faster! So what can I ramble on about today? hmmmm oh I know, So my friend has this list of the things she want to do.  So I am thinking I should make me one of those!  Lets see what do I want to do....

* Be the all time Farkle Campion (or just always beat bryan)
* Drive a ski doo
*Learn to water ski
*Wait maybe I should learn to swim first
* Watch the sun rise (crazy that I have never done that)
*Find a lost dog and get a reward
*Literally  scare the crap out of someone. That would be amazing!
*Go to a Pro Football game.  I think that would be great!
* Get my dad addicted to Facebook.
* Have long hair again
* Be as crafty as the blogs i look at!
*Go to a amustment park that is bigger than Lagoon
* To throw water in someones face.  like the movies I know I am weird
* Not be scared to go on water slides :)
*I would LOVE to ski dive!
*Be able to paint my nails and not pick it of within 24 hours
* Be able to be around my sister and not say one swear word!
* Kiss in the rain
*Go on a road trip across the US.
* Learn to can like my grandma
*have my very own garden
* I would love not to be so ticklish
* Make a quilt
*See Bryan sing Karaoke
* Learn to ice skate
* Build a tree house how cool would that be!
......Well those are some random thoughts right now...ummm but now its is time to leave work!!!! YES!

Reflection

So the other day I was flipping threw the Desert book catalog and a book caught my eye.  The name sounded so familiar and then when I read the little summary I knew exactly who it was.  While I was in the hospital last year there was this 30 something year old guy cruzing the Primary Children hospital halls right along with me.  I didn't know much about his condition all I knew was that he was waiting for a transplant and we had the same surgeon. Also it gave me comfort knowing I wasnt the oldest patient in the hospital! I would see him the the hall pushing his Iv pole and O2 just like me, also one Sunday he gave a amazing testimony in the little "Hospital ward" we could go to.  Also I wasn't able to have my surgery on Friday because a heart was found and he was able to have his transplant so I got bumped! So apparently he is a LDS music composer and he wrote a book about his experience with a congenital heart defect. He also has a blog that I have been addicted to reading! ( http://mytricuspidatresia.blogspot.com/ ) Anyways, its been a year since his transplant so that means it has almost been a year since my last two heart surgerys. I remember being so mad when he got to go home before me!  Shoot he got a new heart you, would have thought I could have recovered faster from two surgery's!  So all these memories just made we really think about how blessed I am.   How merciful the Lord is to his children.  How he can heal peoples heart physically and spiritually every day for millions and billions of people!

  I cant believe its been  almost a year since my last surgery's! How things have changed! How I am so healthy and so happy.  I would have never thought that would happy a year ago!  Also I cant believe that in a short year how sick my brother has got.  Shoot even in the last six make that three months!  Now its him siting in the hospital bed trying to see a light in all the crazy hospital gloom!  I guess its true when they say that you never know what lies ahead of you! So in short what I learned is don't wait to do things.  Make every second count because you never know!  Make sure you love as much as you can, experiences as much as you can and do as much good in the world as you can!

These pics my dad gladly sent me that he found on his phone! He is so nice to capture my happy moments last year :)

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Luckist girl ever!

So I am just going to come right out and say it...I am the luckiest girl ever! I have a amazing boyfriend, amazing family and friends, great job and have been having AMAZING summer!  It seems like summer has been flying by way to fast!  I have done alot of fun things and still have so much more I want to do! Its been a blast!

So on sunday the R.S lesson was on the talk Come What May, and Love 
Such a GREAT talk! Anyhoo it just reminded me how much I have to be grateful!  I never would have thought that just a year ago I was siting in the hospital not knowing when I would get out of that place!  I remember thinking that there is no way my life will be normal again.. I was going to be a burden on my family and have to live with my parents for ever. Also be stuck with my darn oxygen fallowing behind me hooked up to IV;s forever! So I would never have friends again and shoot having a boyfriend was just not even a thought! But now just one year later and actually its only 6 months since I started to feel normal again  I have so much joy in my life!  So it just reminded me that when we are in the middle of a trail there is always hope.  No matter how bleak things seem to be things will always work out in the end... this is my new fav. scriptures.

D&C 58:3

Search ^adiligently, ^bpray always, and be believing, and ^call things shall work together for yourgood

D&C 100:15

Therefore, let your hearts be comforted; for ^aall things shall work together for good

Life is great!  Thanks everyone who has been a blessing in my life!!!

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The things I learned today....

So today was a interesting day and I learned alot so I thought I would share my thoughts...

Hitting your head on a door while you open it hurts but more importantly will leave a nice mark...

Sometimes at work I need to be like thumper "if you dont have anything nice to say dont say anything at all"

Unexpected flowers totally makes my day...but angers me I dont know who they came from!

Looking at old pictures sure does make me laugh! Oh how would it be to be three or four again?

Back in the day my grandpa was pretty good looking, way to go grandma!

Asphalt pie is never as good as it needs to be..

When you go to the children's clinic and give your birthday and say 5-13-83, they think you are joking about the 83 part...but sadly no no i am not joking at all.

The scale at the children's clinic is my new best friend! It said I was 10 pound lighter than i thought!

The sign that says "Please do not allow children to play with the instruments" no longer applies to me, for I am not a child and that sign says nothing about not allowing adults to play with them!

The seat in the dr. office is made for kids so its lower than you think...next time I will prepare myself for that.

I am basically a Dr. I talked them into letting me hook myself up to the EKG...and guess what I did it right and faster than they do!

I now know that Dr.s gossip about patients... I found this out when my one SLC Dr. who came to pocatello said "So Dr. Green said you have a nice looking boyfriend...is he here with you do I get to meet him?" True story that happened!

I also learned that I know some pretty amazing people!

Down at the JRD!

So I am sitting at work and you know those day when your brain just cant think so to try to do work is just a joke?  Yeah its one of those days today!   So I thought to my self, I will sit here and update my blog and just type away and everyone will think I am just working my little heart out! Haha. Well so lets see what can a update everyone on?   Last Friday I had my check up with my cardiologist in SLC.  So I dragged Bryan with me and also took Kirianna for the ride too! I am so happy because all is well!  My heart is still beating, in a normal rhythm  well normal for me that is.   I also was granted my wish… to stop taking  my blood thinners!  Now I wont bruise like a peach! I also had to laugh at Dr. Green.  We have spent some time together , he knows me pretty well… So we are friends.  So it made me smile when he asked me if I was still in love, and had to drill me about Bryan to make sure he was good enough for me. Ha ha  Got to love the protective men in my life! Then like a true doctor he turned around and gave me the birth control talk!  It just makes me laugh cuz he knows I am LDS, and so is he!  But as my Dr. he had to tell me. Haha  Bless his heart!  

Also my brother  found out he has the same kind of infection I had last year!  Crazy small world huh!  I feel so bad  for him!  I know all to well how sick that makes a person!  You know I don’t get that emotional but when I saw my bro in the hospital and knowing exactly what he is going through I had to have a good cry.   It just brought back bad memories that I thought I had blocked out!  Yuck!  The good thing is Aaron isn’t as drama full as me, he isn’t allergic to ever med to treat it like I am. And they caught it early so no damage to anything!  So that is the bright side to the situation!

So I have also been doing a lot of self  evaluating lately and realized that I am slacking in a lot of areas in my life.  Its so hard some times to juggle everything you want to do in life! Its not like what I am spending my time doing isn’t good, but I just have to much “good” in my life right now that I need rethink my way of getting things done.   But the this I do know that if I make it my priority to do the most important things then everything else will fallow.  I have a new resolution to have longer more constant   scripture study and also have more meaningful prayers.  You know the kind that I don’t end out falling asleep in the middle of.  Also I need to make it to the temple more often.  I know that doing just those few simple things that I should be doing anyways will change everything about my day and  will only be for the better!

Hair today, Hair tomorrow

Well today is a big step for me!  Kinda scary but it needs to be done:) For some of you, you may already know this about you, some might have guessed already and some have no clue but I am ready to let the cat out of the bag, or should I say hat out of the bag. ha ha  Well my friends today the wig is coming off!  Yes thats right I said wig.   Last year with all my sickness and crazyness I lost all my hair. Sad I know! After all the stress, anesthesia, and medication it just started falling out, and keep going till i finally shaved it. So I have been sporting a wig or as i refer to it as my hat, these last 9 months or so.  I honestly think that losing your hair is one of the hardest things you can go threw,  I know i sound like a baby its just hair right? But it was like the last straw the broke the camels back last year.  My sickness took everything away from me, my healthy, my social life, my independence and then took the one thing that made me feel normal still, my hair.  I am so glad I was blessed with a wonderful family and friends at that time.  My family made it ok to laugh about. (and boy does my dad and tara love to joke about it) Also my friend Kim who went threw a battle with cancer was right there with me knowing how exactly i felt about losing my hair.  So its been a long year of bad hair days :) Although I am still not confident about going with out my wig, i feel a sense of relief.  With the wig gone i will not be reminded everyday of how sick i was,  I wont be scared that its going to fly off ha ha.  This is my last thing to take back that was taken from me last year!  So as of today everything from last year is now behind me and it feels great! I just want to thank my friends and family for the support, Also Bryan for being understandable and threatening to take my wigs from me. I wouldn't have been able to take this step with out them.  THANK YOU! So lets hear it for REAL HAIR! woot woot!

Before I started to get sick, Ah hair!

While I was sick, Started to fall out about this time :)

 My favorite wig :) oh and my favorite person :)

 This is me now! 

Its been a while... :)

Well I  thought it was about time to update this blasted thing! Alot has happened in the past month or so.  Alot of good times!  I have been up to the same old no good:) Just working and having as much fun as possible!! Time has just been flying around here!  So today has been a GREAT day!  Well the whole weekend has been!  So today was stake conference, so Bryan and I went out to McCammon to go to watch it there with the fam.  It was a really good spiritual boost!  I got reminded of alot of things I need to be doing and alot of blessings I should be more grateful for! Sometimes I forget about all the blessings I have been given, I dont know why I have been blessed so much, I just hope I can do good with what I have been given! After conference we went to grandmas to have a BBQ.  There was some yummy food and I am still full from it! I love my family,  we might be crazy and joke around a little to much but they are the best!  Ha ha we sure do know how to laugh!! oh the good times! 

Anyhoo everything else in my life is excellent!  I am feeling great! Cant complain!!  So here are a few pics for those who are not on facebook, that shows what I have been up to!

ugh Work!

JAZZ GAME

So on Monday Bryan and I went down to a Jazz game. It was tons of fun! He had his roommate Brandon come too and so of course Brandon needed to have a chance to get a little sugar too so I had my cousin Heather come too! Its was great to see Heather again, while I had real clothes on and not on drugs :) (For those who dont know my mom has a sister she just barely met last year so Heather is her daughter, and the only time I have met them is while i was in the hospital) So thanks to a wonderful boss, I got to go early from work! Amazing what the Dutton name can do around here! So yes I went to my first Jazz game, I think my life will forever be changed :) (or at least thats what I will tell Bryan)

Luck of the Irish.

So its about time I update this again....





Well I guess the most exciting thing that is going on in my life would be that I've meet a Amazing guy! His name is Bryan, he is the best. Its been really fun getting to know him, I now have to learn to be a jazz fan ha ha. So we became "official" on St. Patricks day. Ha ha you know "official" by putting it on facebook.It was a fun night, Bryan was so good and slaved over a hot stove all day and made me dinner...ha ha ok maybe he didn't slave a way but more of put it in the oven but it was still yummy :) Then We watch you guessed it a Jazz game. It was great! Honestly I don't care at all to watch basketball as long as its with him! Oh and then the next day it was the start of March Madness...
Here is a pic of us watching the BYU vs Gator game...I even had my gator shirt on! Good Thing I let byu win, so Bryan didn't cry :)

So yeah its been a great week or so! ha ha we ended it by going to the MV alumni Basketball game to watch Aaron play! ha ha wow we are a basketball lov'n fools!

Well I now have to think of something to do this week for I am on vacation! Any ideas?

What was I thinking?

So today I got reminded of some childhood memories. After work I had to go get some parts for my dad. It brought me right back to when I was just a little girl going with my mom and grandma to every part store in south east idaho i swear getting parts for the farm. But then I remember how I would sit there and think to myself how when I grow up I wanted to be a parts girl. I thought that would be the coolest thing ever. Not that I like parts but no it was cuz I wanted to be the cool girl working with a place full of guys! So I guess my love for the male gender started early :) ha ha Thinking about it maybe I should rethink my job....:) maybe my childhood dream could be the right thing for me... do you think parts girls make 15-20 bucks a hour?

But then again if I would go by what I thought as a child I would also be a dance teacher, and rodeo queen... I dont think that would happen due to that fact I dont have a horse and only rode one twice in my life :)

Can you say Slacker?

So I am like a total slacker! Its been a while! I guess the months have just flown by! So I am SO SO EXCITED it is almost spring! I think I have the worst case of spring fever EVER! I want to start sport'n the shorts and flip flops! But it just wont get warm enough. I guess that is ok cuz I am white as a ghost! So maybe if I get some tan going it will somehow effect the weather?





Anyways So today was a great day! haha I made my dad swear at church, had yummy cookies and played some mario and great of all I had a nap! But you know what made me happy I wore my Hooters shirt today. I dont know why that makes me so happy but it does! (its the same way my playboy bunny sheets and fun bras makes me happy) No one sees them but me and no way would I wear my shirt out in public but all the same it make me smile! ha ha And its my Jacksonville one!

ITS OVER!!!

This Week Is OVER! well work week that is! So I just barely went back to work. Yeah I know I am a slacker...its been about a year of no work for me! Anyhoo, So the other girl Lisa who works up front and runs the show was gone this week! So I had to do her job. Well like half her job, she does alot more then I did this week. :) But I just have to say, Lisa your amazing! You do way to much to make everyone happy and everything go smooth! I am glad she will be back on Monday! Cuz for a slacker like me working all day after not at all really makes me tired! One day I was alseep by 8! Only to wake to my mom poking me to make me take my meds! Lets say I wasnt to happy about that! But hey I went right back to sleep after that so no harm no foul.

Oh so to day I did get some joy in! I got to drive my dads new 350 ford diesel king cab home from poky! Now if you want to feel like king of the road drive that sucker! I felt like a little girl driving on her moms lap in the car. I found the whole experience to be quite enjoyable! So tonight I will finally get to play the wii! That darn Mario....he is addicting! And dont get me started on the Lego game!

Addictions!

So there are a few things in my life that I am addicted to! Now most people will think my little joys I find in life are kinda strange but I love them! So I just want to share a few things I am addicted to and love!

Retractable Sharpie Pens! I thought my love for sharpie pens couldn't run deeper...but then they made them retractable! I know its amazing right! I show people them all the time and talk about them! They are my new Favorite!

Soft Lips-winter mint! This is the best chap stick ever! Since this summer my lips have cracked and are so gross looking but this is the best chap stick I have found! Love it!

NCIS! Ok I honestly could watch this show all the time! I think I have watch all the episodes twice! but still love it! I dont know why. Its not like I have a hidden passion to go to a crime scenes and figure out who and why they are killed. To be honest I think I personally would die if i ever stumbled across a murder! Shoot I had to vomit when I saw our dog kill and eat a mouse! Yes there is no way that I Mandy Avery could be a NCIS agent! I guess I will just have to stick to watching in on the TV!

Post it notes! Now this has been a addiction of mine for a very long time! It was seeded in me on my mission. Although I have loved them for a long time it doesn't make my love fore them weaken! In fact I think my love for them has just grown over time! Is it bad I look for reasons to use a post it note?

CRAFTINESS! Ok This makes me happy even typing it! ok don't judge me I spent like over a hour online going from blog to blog about crafts and it made me oh so happy! I honestly think I get a high when I go to craft stores. Now don't get the wrong idea just cuz I love crafts doesn't mean I am good at them! I have a sleight problem I blame on my grandparents. I have the perfectionist of my grandma in me. If something is off at all it drives me nuts! But I also have the umm inpatients of my grandpa! If I cant do it right the first time I cant stand to sit there and fix things over and over again. So that compo keeps me from doing most crafts but I still love to look at them and hope one day I can overcome my grandparents ;)

I have many more addictions but this is all I have time for....

NEW YEAR~

So Wow! its been over a year since I last blogged! But hey I think you will forgive me after the year I had! So I decided I am going to make a strong effort into blogging regularly. I think it is good and healthy to have a place to vent and write down your life story. So wish me luck! For a while I was trying to think of how I can catch up on the last year, but then I thought to my self that would be a very long sad depressing blog! Anyways most of who will read thins knows all my drama so I will just take a quick sec to do a run threw....

Jan Dr's think i have a blood clot and i grew extra vains
Feb Not a blood clot but need a valve replaced..ok make that two
Mar Open heart surgery
Apr Reaction to antibiotics - not pretty
May Removed extra vains
Jun Deathly sick, send me home on iv meds, still sick, find a infection on new valve
Jul. Aug. Sep. Still sick, way sick! Honestly I dont remember much form these months. I know I was in the hospital most the time, had a lung surgery, valve replaced, pacemaker put in and more drugs. :)
Oct. still in the hospital- but got out in time for Halloween
Nov. Went for check up have A Flutter now...more time in the hospital.
Dec. ONLY MONTH NOT IN THE HOSPITAL! only cuz I was on blood thinner and they couldnt go in and fix the a flutter!

SO although last year was full of needles, bad news, hospitals, surgery, vomit and tears, I learned so much! I learned that the Lord cares for you even you feel like you are in hell. Also that Family and friends who care will be there no matter what. Also I learned that blessing will come after the trial! (when I am done with this trial I will tell you about the blessing;) )

So now with all that behind me I am ready for a new year! Ready to do what the Lord needs me to do. Oxygen tank and all I am relieing on Him! So everyone there it is, my goal for the year. Please stay in touch and peek in every once in a while to see where my crazy life has taken me!